Wedding Tips

The year of weddings is upon me.

For my grandparents, the summer and fall after high school was when everyone they knew got married. For my parents, it was the summer and fall after college. With the sociological creep in adolescence, I am finding that the 28th year is wedding crunch time for me. In October alone, I have three weddings to attend. And that doesn't count the weddings I just can't feasibly get to.

In that spirit, I wanted to offer some money-saving wedding tips that Michael and I employed to have a spirited affair that didn't break the bank. It should be said that the average wedding costs around $20,000 now, which is really obscene if you ask me.

And, it should also be said that there are far more exhaustive resources than my blog for wedding tips. But, the whole wedding industry - including the 'tips' industry - often loses sight of the marriage by placing too much emphasis on the wedding. Having just passed our one year anniversary, Michael and I are great examples of how the wedding ceremony is not the end, but instead, the beginning. Everyone involved in weddings would do well to remind themselves of that.

So, given that the wedding ceremony is a chance to celebrate your relationship, there are a number of things that you can do to reflect oyur own values and priorities as a couple that have the added benefit of saving money. Here are some tips that Michael and I used to keep the costs down, and the focus where it should be:

-We convinced a friend to create several playlists on her ipod in lieu of a DJ. This allowed us a lot more control over the playlists, which gave us a chance to incorporate many more songs that were important to us, our family and our friends. Also, we could avoid the dreaded chicken dance.

-Go somewhere that's hard to get to: only the people who mean the most to you will make the trek, and you can still invite lots of people (this doesn't mean Hawaii...try a 10-14 hour drive for most guests - the effort people make to join you will be all the more special.)

-Culinary and art schools have great leads on student caterers and photographers. Many times, the teacher will incorporate your wedding into a class project to give them hands-on experience. Make sure to ask for senior-year students. They will do everything for you - give you the digital negatives, do a full tasting, etc. Make it worth their while, though, and really talk them up.

-Buy your place settings at IKEA. Way cheaper than renting (by half, at least), and you can donate them to a shelter or nonprofit afterwards.

-Or better yet, give them away as favors.

-Speaking of favors, don't give them out. No one will walk away from the event feeling like they were robbed because they didn't get a mix CD of your favorite songs.

-Speaking of nonprofits, they are great places to scope out doing the ceremony and/or reception. Many historic homes, art museums, etc can be rented for private events quite reasonably, and really make a unique experience.

-Have a gay wedding: you can still invite people, but some of them won't come! Plus, you can really save a lot when you don't have to buy a girl's engagement ring or a dress.